Hi, my name is Gus. I’m a loveable, squishy, dimply little guy who really wants to get to know you. Once we’re acquainted, I’ll hang around as long as you let me. I’m loyal, stubborn and potentially yours forever. I hate rejection and change, and I thrive on poor choices and apathy. Feed me the right stuff, I’m partial to burgers and fries, and we’ll never part.
Despite my boundless loyalty and perseverance, I’m not very popular these days. There are too many do-gooders and health nuts, trying to diet and exercise the likes of me out of their lives. Hormonal factors and genetics are my second home and provide a good back up residence, but even those hosts are less welcoming these days. I hate saying goodbye but usually it’s only temporary. Most attempts to shrink me don’t last, and then I’m back; even bigger and better than before!
Eviction Notices Have Been Served
These days, hosts are wily, and they’re getting better at evictions. CoolSculpting is a new threat, and I’m taking it seriously. I’ve had friends who disappeared, never to be seen again after their host had a CoolSculpting treatment. This is real, it’s happening, and it may become an epidemic. I’ll be honest, of course, I don’t like this technology because it’s safe, effective and results in little to no downtime after the procedure. Too often the results are good-bye to me, and 20% of my other friends for good.
How are they getting rid of my buddies so effectively you ask?
I don’t like to admit my weaknesses or talk about my Achilles heel, but I hate the cold. Turns out if I’m stuck in a cool climate for a certain amount of time, and at a certain freezing temperature all the internal alarms sound and a natural mechanism is activated that tells me to die. It’s just not fair, all the other cells and tissues around me don’t have the same issue with the cold I do. They are safe, and I am not. CoolSculpting is a cold, effective killer of us fat cells.
It’s a slow death too. It can take me 2-3 days to die, and then I start my official journey out of the body. I fight, scream, yell and plead, but I’m no match for CoolSculpting, an FDA-cleared treatment. Within 2-4 months I’m gone, and I have no chance of being remade. It’s goodbye, Gus hello new contours and increased confidence. Life is a journey, and my path has been successfully blocked with CoolSculpting.
If you haven’t yet figured out how to evict my friends and I and you’re tired of playing host, book an appointment now. Release yourself from the likes of us with CoolSculpting.
